I can't respond, but I can post it!
I’ve been meaning to e-mail you for quite some time- whenever you spoke about players with bad attitudes or unacceptable behavior – and how they can destroy a team.
I was finally motivated by the post from “K & D” -“ College Volleyball Recruiting Success Story” - when the author wrote “I also enjoyed seeing you talk about the importance of chemistry, since my daughter's club team had one toxic player on it. The poor coach had his hands tied, since he had to play her because that girl's family paid good money for the season…” Guess what! 10 to 11 other parent’s paid good money too! The coach and Club Director wimped out if that was the excuse for keeping the player on the team. Tolerating poor behavior does no one any good – and in fact is a tremendous disservice to the player – as she will not learn that her poor behavior has consequences.
Our club worked very hard to develop a player/parent handbook that sets for the expectations for all participants – players, parents and coaches – and contracts are signed and adhered to. Unacceptable behavior can and does result in dis-enrollment from the club. Is it hard to enforce? Absolutely. We went so far as to send a coach home from a major Qualifier this year for failure to meet the club’s code of conduct and dis-enrolled an outstanding player when both the player and parents were disrespectful and violated Club rules.
Players and parents are counseled and held accountable for their conduct. Volleyball is a team sport and no one – no matter how talented as an athlete has the right to behave badly and disrupt her team. I’d rather write a refund check and send the family packing then make the rest of the team suffer through a season filled with drama and poor behavior.
As a collegiate coach – you are dealing with players that develop through the club system. If a player shows up at college and demonstrates toxic behavior or a bad attitude – the responsibility lies squarely with her parents, and former club coaches and Directors.
As a Volleymom I know that setting forth expectations needs to start early! My daughter is held accountable by her Dad and me, her coaches and her teammates. She has been exposed to teams with great chemistry, and others with drama queens. The great chemistry and positive attitude were her favorite seasons.
Thanks so much for this great blog and letting me throw in my 2 cents!
PS – my daughter is in the Class of 2013 – so I know you cannot respond directly.
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